


Like a Warm Hug

by dinosaurspice



Category: D.Gray-man
Genre: Gen, Kanda gets a weighted blanket, Pre-Canon, Tiedoll is a Good Dad, a little bit of a self-insert fic, child Kanda, just a slightly angsty fluff piece, sleep issues
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-23
Updated: 2018-04-23
Packaged: 2019-04-26 16:15:42
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,958
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14405823
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dinosaurspice/pseuds/dinosaurspice
Summary: Tiedoll is distressed by young Kanda's poor sleep habits. So he gets him a weighted blanket.Originally posted on my Tumblr: dinosaur-bones6





	Like a Warm Hug

**Author's Note:**

> I haven't edited this thing since I posted it on Tumblr months ago, and I don't intend to lol

Yuu—Kanda, he was just Kanda now—had had trouble sleeping for as long as he could remember. Before, he used to simply pass out from exhaustion and pain, or Alma would talk so much that he’d bore Kanda to sleep. But neither of those happened anymore. And now whenever he did manage to fall asleep, he saw things. Things he wished he could stop seeing. And they woke him up. Meditation helped a little. Ever since Tiedoll had introduced him to the practice, Kanda noticed that he could relax enough to fall asleep or at least doze almost anywhere he wanted. However, Kanda still wasn’t very good at meditating. Sometimes it took too long, and he often ended up losing his focus or being unable to tune out the outside world enough to focus at all. And then whenever he woke up in the middle of the night, he’d be alert for a long time. So staying asleep remained a problem for him.

 

Turning over yet again on the hard ground, Kanda released a harsh shot of air through his nose. His body simply refused to unwind. He was restless, having to shake his foot and shift his weight endlessly though he didn’t know why. He just . . . had to. There was too much energy; it couldn’t get out. He didn’t know how long this went on before his mind slowly drifted again, but too soon after, he was fidgety again, and he flipped onto his back once more, trying to wedge his shoulders as tightly as he could between the large rock on his left side and the weird lumpy earth on his right side.

 

A few feet away, Tiedoll sat awake by the fire and listened to his newest apprentice toss and turn. It wasn’t unusual. Although young Kanda had been travelling with him and Daisya for almost a year now, his restless sleeping hadn’t improved much. At first, Tiedoll had assumed the struggle was from adjusting to the ever-fluctuating schedule of travel. Daisya had had the same issue for the first couple weeks, so Tiedoll hadn’t been too worried about Kanda at first. However, it had quickly become obvious that Kanda was much more high-strung than Daisya. He seemed to have nightmares, too; though Kanda didn’t talk about them, they likely exacerbated his troubled sleep.

 

Tiedoll wished there were something he could do. He’d started teaching Kanda to meditate because the boy hadn’t had many coping strategies when they’d first met, and he hoped that skill alleviated the sleeping problem even a little. But sometimes Tiedoll wished he could just make Kanda lie still at night. The poor child rarely seemed to sleep deeply; he was always stimulated by something, or he’d shift and fidget on his own, perhaps anxious from nightmares. Tiedoll sighed noiselessly and turned his eyes pityingly to Kanda, who had ended up half curled on his side with his blanket wrapped tightly around his small body. He shifted his gaze to Daisya, who slumbered quietly with one arm thrown over his eyes and his feet spread wide. Despite the warm September air, Kanda looked cold in comparison. Maybe he needed a thicker blanket.

 

Three nights later, the trio had the luxury of sleeping indoors. The owner of a cozy shanty outside Utrecht let them stay in his sons’ former room, the children having moved out years ago. The room had two beds just large enough for an average-sized adult, so although Kanda and Daisya had to share, they were both too happy to sleep on a mattress to be overly worried about personal space. The bed was large enough for them, anyway.

 

Tiedoll let the boys settle in first and stayed in the living area with the host, Felix, and his wife, Ilse. The elderly couple asked about his travels, and Tiedoll told them amiably of the beautiful places he’d seen recently, sparing the details about the nature of his missions.

 

“Ah, but the young apprentices, they must be very weary,” Ilse remarked with a hint of concern.

 

Tiedoll smiled over his cup of tea. “Oh, sure. But children are always full of energy. They certainly have much more than I.”

 

Knowing laughter rippled from the husband and wife.

 

“Oh, yes,” chuckled Felix. “Our two boys—boundless! They were always active, even when they were supposed to be asleep.”

 

Ilse nodded. “Yes. Robert was especially restless. He still is always moving, never concentrating on his studies, but especially as a boy, he could never sit quietly. Sleep eluded him for a long time.”

 

Tiedoll’s eyebrows rose, interest piqued. “Oh? And how did you get him to sleep? Or did he simply grow out of it?”

 

“Oh, it was a battle to figure out, though it did get better with age.” Ilse shook her head but soon perked up with a smile. “But the remedy was simple. I sewed very heavy blankets, making them with many little pockets that I filled first with beans and grains and then, when I discovered them cheaply in town, with little glass beads. The kind used for doll making.”

 

The gentle old woman sipped at her tea. Tiedoll did the same, watching her expectantly.

 

“The pressure from those heavy blankets is soothing,” she explained. “I imagine it works the same as swaddling for infants, providing security and warmth. Robert said it was like a warm hug all over, and in fact, he still has the large blanket I finished two winters ago. It took quite a long time since the blanket was so heavy. The weight had to increase as he grew up, of course.”

 

Tiedoll nodded as understanding sank in. “I see. Yes, that makes sense. And what happened to his old blankets?”

 

Ilse’s head cocked to one side. “Hm? Oh, once I knew Robert preferred the glass beads, I simply added to one blanket over the years. I do still have the first one I made for him, the one with beans, and actually, we found that we like to use it every now and then. Of course, it fits across only one of us at a time.”

 

Tiedoll smiled patiently while the woman and now Felix chatted in rambling tangents. He couldn’t be so rude as to cut them off, especially since they had been so hospitable. And now he had another favor to ask.

 

Finally, a break in the conversation opened.

 

“You see,” he began, “I think one of my apprentices has a similar problem with falling asleep. Or rather, staying asleep. So I’m very intrigued by your story.”

 

“Indeed?” asked Felix, turning to his wife.

 

“Of course, you must try the blanket!” Ilse exclaimed, rising from her seat.

 

She shuffled out and back in more spryly than Tiedoll had expected of her, and she returned with a bulky quilt that she placed on Tiedoll’s lap. It was indeed heavy, maybe ten or twelve pounds, and full of lumpy pellets—the grains and beans. Ilse sat back down beside her husband, fanning her flushed face with her hand. Not so spry, then, but definitely full of heart.

 

“And you may certainly keep it if it helps. We understand how hard it is, don’t we, Felix, when a child doesn’t sleep. It affects their entire mood, their attention, their behavior.”

 

Felix gazed lovingly at his wife. “I don’t know what we would have done without Ilse’s innovativeness.”

 

Tiedoll smiled at the couple with every ounce of gratitude in his heart. “Thank you very much. I’ll let you know how it goes.”

 

When Tiedoll finally retired to the room he shared with Kanda and Daisya, the boys were already in bed and sleeping. Well, they _had_ been asleep, but the sound of the door opening evidently roused Kanda, who stirred visibly on the outer edge of the bed. Tiedoll winced, but he knew Kanda’s waking had been inevitable. The boy was such a light sleeper that a noise or touch could sometimes startle him from sleep.

 

“Yuu,” he whispered as he approached, carrying the heavy quilted blanket and a candle. Kanda’s already opened eyes, heavy-lidded though they were, landed on him.

 

“I’ve another blanket for you.” Tiedoll set his candle down on the nightstand between the beds before he spread the blanket over Kanda. The boy frowned at him, drowsy and confused. Dark bags hung under his eyes.

 

“I don’t need it,” Kanda muttered in a squeaky half-whisper.

 

“I’ll just lay it here.” Tiedoll patted the spot over Kanda’s chest. “If you don’t like it, you can take it off later. Good night.”

 

Kanda was still perplexed but said nothing as his teacher pulled away and turned to his travelling bag. He shimmied his body, curious about the sudden weight all over. What the heck kind of blanket was this? It pressed heavily on his legs, his chest, his arms, and it made a sound like rolling pebbles when it shifted. He lifted a knee, marveling a little at the increased resistance on his muscles, and, out of habit, wiggled his toes into the sheet under him. The new blanket weighed down even his foot; before he knew it, his foot was motionless. His eyes closed steadily. He squirmed a tiny bit again, testing the weight on his hips. It was like being wrapped up in an envelope or a meat bun, all warm and enclosed. The weight was everywhere; whenever Kanda moved even a little, he could feel it. Even his breathing made him aware of the pressure. Moving his hands on his chest, his attention fixated on the soothing pressure on his fingers, wrists, and arms all the way to his shoulders. This sensation was . . . it was . . . Kanda didn’t know what to call it, but it felt good.

 

Eventually, his knee lowered to the mattress again, and when his head lolled slightly to the side, Tiedoll knew, delightedly, that Kanda was asleep. The next morning, he was even more pleased to see that Kanda appeared to have rested peacefully the rest of the night. The boy hardly seemed to have moved at all!

 

For Kanda, though, waking up in the same position he’d fallen asleep in was disorienting. Had he not slept at all? No, he felt rested. Very well rested, actually. But Kanda was confused. Maybe this was a dream. It kind of felt like a dream. He lay still for a long time with the blanket pulled up to his chin, too wary to move. Daisya sat up next to him, stretched, and lifted the corner of the new blanket inquisitively when he noticed the new addition.

 

“Huh? What’s this?”

 

“A weighted blanket,” Tiedoll answered jovially, alerting both boys to his presence on the floor. “Our hosts have given it to us, so we’ll be taking it.”

 

Daisya wrinkled his nose. “Why?”

 

Kanda wanted to know, too, but he didn’t speak.

 

“Because it’s helpful.” Tiedoll stood up from packing his bag. “Start getting ready, you two.”

 

Daisya shrugged and pushed his blanket off him. “Okay. Man, I slept good! For once, Kanda didn’t kick the crap outta me!”

  
Kanda sat up wordlessly, pinching the weighted blanket between his fingers, feeling the strange pebble things stitched inside. It still felt heavy on his legs, which was weird but also weirdly _nice_. Part of him wanted to curl up under it again. It was amazing—he’d slept last night for the first time in ages. Because of the blanket? Kanda didn’t know, but if it had helped even a little . . .

 

Sliding out of bed, he eyed Tiedoll suspiciously, and Tiedoll pretended not to notice. How did that old man know? How did he _always_ know? Kanda didn’t like it, but he did like sleeping. So he packed the blanket without a fuss.


End file.
